I have tried to back up every statement of fact that I make. For the most part, I have linked to respected unbiased organizations and news sites and resisted posting to blogs and advocacy groups, and when I couldn't find an original source, I tried to state that. That doesn't mean I always did; sometimes an advocacy group has a much better presentation of facts in a format that is easy to read and understand. You can judge for yourself the legitimacy of the information, but remember: you are always entitled to your own opinion, but you are never entitled to your own facts.
Republicans are usually considered the "Pro-Life" party. They certainly are anti-choice, though of course there are a few pro-choice Republicans and more than a few anti-choice Democrats (remember Bart Stupak?) But as a national party, the GOP takes a strong stand against abortion, and accomplished many legislative victories across the country, while for the most part, Democrats aren't nearly as committed. Oh, they say they're for reproductive freedom, and there are Democrats in both state and federal legislatures that fight for choice, but they don't have near the amount of victories (just an impressive string of failures) or passion as their Republican opponents.
But are Republicans really Pro-Life? I decided to take a look at the newly approved party platform. You can read the entire platform here. I will be quoting the relevant bits.
Showing posts with label homophobia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label homophobia. Show all posts
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Sunday, May 6, 2012
What Boys Can Learn From Girls (or: Be a Pussy).
A repost of something I wrote years ago.
(Trigger Warning for homophobia, child abuse, and sexual assault.)
My brother is a decent kid, and I love him, but that doesn’t change the fact that he’s homophobic.
To his credit, he doesn’t want to be a homophobe...he’s a good, progressive boy raised by a progressive mom, living in a progressive area (San Francisco), and he has a lesbian sister (me) that he loves. He’d never beat up or tease a gay kid--he’s stuck up for a gay kids, or kids that were perceived as gay/effeminate, at school and boy scouts, even--he’s totally supportive of civil rights for the queer community and voted against Prop 8. I’m not saying he should get a medal for this; treating gay people like, well, people, is the bare requirement for being a decent human being, in my book. But I say this to establish that he doesn’t hate gay people or wish us harm.
But he’s still homophobic.
I use homophobic in the literal sense, not the general usage of the term. He is afraid of gay people. Well, gay men. Like many 19-year-old, heterosexual boys, he’s a product of our porn culture, and really likes lesbians. At least the “hot” ones. (But that’s a different rant, for a different time.) Gay men freak him out. Though he’s known several out gay boys, he’s never had a gay friend, and doesn’t want one. He’d never dream of interfering in the lives of gay men, but he doesn’t want to be a part of their lives, either.
To his credit, he admits that this is a problem, specifically his problem and not something that gay people cause just by the fact of their existence. To his discredit, he doesn’t think that it’s possible to change the way he feels, and has no intention of making an effort to change. “It’s just the way it is,” he says. “Any guy would feel the same way.”
(Presumably, he means any heterosexual guy. It’s a little thing, but it really shows his deep bias against gay folk, even with his progressive politics. All guys are heterosexual. Gays are “other.”)
We had a long conversation the other day, during which I tried to get to the bottom of his homophobia. How can a kid who doesn’t really have a moral problem with homosexuality, who actively supports gay rights, who has been raised around gay people and has gay family, still harbor a deep fear against gay men? It came down to a couple of things.
First, he finds gay sex skeevy. Okay. I can understand that; I find a lot of sex gross, hetero and homo. Hell, the time I heard my parents having sex in the shower scarred me for life, but it doesn’t mean I’m afraid of my parents. After some thought, he agreed. Yeah, he thinks gay sex is nasty, but it doesn’t make him afraid. He just doesn’t think about it. Which is good, because frankly, I think that people who like to sit around all day long thinking about sex acts in general, and sex acts that gross them out in particular, are just perverts. (Here’s looking at you, Peter LaBarbera.) So that explanation doesn’t work.
The real answer, we discovered, is that he’s afraid that a gay man might find him attractive. He’s super uncomfortable with the thought of another boy checking him out. He has no idea what to do if a guy hits on him--what will he say? How should he act? And, of course, there’s an underlying fear of rape. Even though he acknowledges that it’s stupid (and arrogant), that he knows gay people aren’t roaming the streets looking to molest his ass, he’s still afraid.
The kicker of the conversation was when he looked at me and said, totally seriously, “You’re not a man. You can’t understand.”
(Trigger Warning for homophobia, child abuse, and sexual assault.)
My brother is a decent kid, and I love him, but that doesn’t change the fact that he’s homophobic.
To his credit, he doesn’t want to be a homophobe...he’s a good, progressive boy raised by a progressive mom, living in a progressive area (San Francisco), and he has a lesbian sister (me) that he loves. He’d never beat up or tease a gay kid--he’s stuck up for a gay kids, or kids that were perceived as gay/effeminate, at school and boy scouts, even--he’s totally supportive of civil rights for the queer community and voted against Prop 8. I’m not saying he should get a medal for this; treating gay people like, well, people, is the bare requirement for being a decent human being, in my book. But I say this to establish that he doesn’t hate gay people or wish us harm.
But he’s still homophobic.
I use homophobic in the literal sense, not the general usage of the term. He is afraid of gay people. Well, gay men. Like many 19-year-old, heterosexual boys, he’s a product of our porn culture, and really likes lesbians. At least the “hot” ones. (But that’s a different rant, for a different time.) Gay men freak him out. Though he’s known several out gay boys, he’s never had a gay friend, and doesn’t want one. He’d never dream of interfering in the lives of gay men, but he doesn’t want to be a part of their lives, either.
To his credit, he admits that this is a problem, specifically his problem and not something that gay people cause just by the fact of their existence. To his discredit, he doesn’t think that it’s possible to change the way he feels, and has no intention of making an effort to change. “It’s just the way it is,” he says. “Any guy would feel the same way.”
(Presumably, he means any heterosexual guy. It’s a little thing, but it really shows his deep bias against gay folk, even with his progressive politics. All guys are heterosexual. Gays are “other.”)
We had a long conversation the other day, during which I tried to get to the bottom of his homophobia. How can a kid who doesn’t really have a moral problem with homosexuality, who actively supports gay rights, who has been raised around gay people and has gay family, still harbor a deep fear against gay men? It came down to a couple of things.
First, he finds gay sex skeevy. Okay. I can understand that; I find a lot of sex gross, hetero and homo. Hell, the time I heard my parents having sex in the shower scarred me for life, but it doesn’t mean I’m afraid of my parents. After some thought, he agreed. Yeah, he thinks gay sex is nasty, but it doesn’t make him afraid. He just doesn’t think about it. Which is good, because frankly, I think that people who like to sit around all day long thinking about sex acts in general, and sex acts that gross them out in particular, are just perverts. (Here’s looking at you, Peter LaBarbera.) So that explanation doesn’t work.
The real answer, we discovered, is that he’s afraid that a gay man might find him attractive. He’s super uncomfortable with the thought of another boy checking him out. He has no idea what to do if a guy hits on him--what will he say? How should he act? And, of course, there’s an underlying fear of rape. Even though he acknowledges that it’s stupid (and arrogant), that he knows gay people aren’t roaming the streets looking to molest his ass, he’s still afraid.
The kicker of the conversation was when he looked at me and said, totally seriously, “You’re not a man. You can’t understand.”
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